Most people have had to put up with the odd disturbance from noisy couples in neighbouring hotel rooms or shared student accomodation. But this is in a different league. Caroline and Steve Cartwright were appealing against an abatement notice, which was imposed in November 2007, and a subsequent Asbo, banning them from making so much noise during sex. Or, as the court put it, preventing the couple from "shouting, screaming or vocalisation at such a level as to be a statutory nuisance".

According to the BBC , "Neighbours, the local postman and a woman taking her child to school complained about the noise." And the magistrate was in little doubt about the extraordinary nature of the couple’s lovemaking:

He said: "We are in no doubt whatsoever about the level of noise that can be heard in neighbouring properties, in the street and in the back lane.

"It certainly was intrusive and constituted a statutory nuisance. It was clearly of a very disturbing nature and it was also compounded by the duration – this was not a one-off, it went on for hours at a time.

"It is further compounded by the frequency of the episode, virtually every night."

When neighbours describe the sounds coming from your house using words like ‘murder’ and ‘considerable pain’ it’s either time to have a rethink or get some soundproofing. Ending up in front of a magistrate, not sexy.

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